Another one bites the dust...

After 2 1/2 years with the company at the restaurant I was finally let go.  I dedicated so much time to that place for it to end the way it did. Oh well, in the process i've made some really great friends and some people i'd rather forget I ever met. In the end it was a fun experiance.  

A new LIFE & new LOVE

On January 20, 2010 I left a 7 year relationship with someone i've known since I was 14 years old. This person was suppose to be my best friend we called each other 'soul mates'.  I thought it was going to last forever even with all his infidelities. I was too caught up in US to worry about ME; then one day I snapped out of it and thought to myself where is this going? 7 years and no proposal, 7 years and no kids. To some it might be okay but I wanted MORE, I wanted a family and future. So I packed some things and called it a day. One of the things I left behind along with some clothes and tears was my dog Jack. I got Jack when he was 6 weeks old and I when I left he was 7years old. It wasn't easy leaving him behind but honestly I had no choice I couldn't take him with me and I felt that he'd be better off with my exboyfriend. Leaving my relationship and my dog put me in hard place, it made me think that nobody would ever truly love me and it left me with trust issues.


Almost  6 months ago things totally changed for me, I met one of the sweetest men in my life. Someone who was willing to bend over backwards for me.  In the bottom of my heart I still feel a little cautious but I know that's not his fault.  I find myself looking at him sometimes and wondering how did I ever catch him. What is so special about me that he loves me. I often find myself trying to push him away, which I know is wrong in so many ways. I love him more and more everyday and he has opened my eyes to true love. To wake up next to him every morning is truly a blessing from the gods. What did I do to deserve this? At times its hard to believe. But his love somehow mended my heart and made me trust again.  The one upside to my life is him. He who puts up with my temper, mood swings and annoying habits; but he loves me and i'm grateful for it everyday.
Hopefully this time around things go a lot better.

Lost in my own world :(

Life. It's something we all take for granted, something we feel will go on  You forever. But have you ever really just sad down and thought about it. In my eyes I feel like I think about it too much, I worry to much and I let everything get the best of me. At times I feel lost, confused and wish that some thing could make it all go away to numb my pain. Lately life hasn't been rainbows and smiles, in my heart I feel like its dragging me down; like all the negativity is getting the best of me. But what do I do? How do I cope? Professional help or what? Instead I created this blog; maybe shouting out to the world will help me a little better. If not forever than at least for a few minutes, hours or days. So here I sit and write hoping that eventually I can change things around in my life.